Simplicity

 

Last night I finished up my "deleting process" and boxed everything up that I had from Taylor.

And I have to say, it was rather refreshing to get rid of so many baseballs. 

One of my friends suggested I be THAT girl and have a bonfire with all his belongings.

I have been THAT girl before, but that was back in 8th grade.

I'm a little too old to be doing such childish things now after a break up.

So, I packed it all up in a big ole box and sealed it shut.

Never to be opened again.

It's funny, I haven't cried since the day it all went down.

It's almost been a week.

I'm a little shocked at myself really, for not being more upset.

Is that strange?

I will say I had a little trouble listening to sad lovey dovey songs on the radio this past week.

But today as I was cleaning my room and Taylor Swift's new song, 'Sad Beautiful Tragic' came on, I sang right along and never felt upset or depressed or anything.

Is something wrong with me?

Is it possible that I was also wanting this break up too without even knowing it?

This is the only reasoning I have to describe my actions at the moment.

I've been through break ups before.

Plenty, actually. {No, I'm not proud of this fact.}

And I usually go into depression for about 1/3 of the amount of time that we dated.

So, if my calculations serve me correctly...

Taylor and I were together for 32 months, so I would have needed a minimum of 11 months to truly be okay.

What is going on here?

It hasn't been a week!

Don't get me wrong.

I'm not saying I'm 100% okay and happy go lucky.

But I'm NOWHERE near as bad as I really thought I was going to be.

 

Maybe it's because we were apart for the past 6 months, so I had already learned to be on my own without him.

With the past break ups, they were all local boys. {With the exception of one, Kyle.}

But Kyle wasn't what I would really call a serious relationship.

Zach and Andy were really the only other serious relationships I had before Taylor.

 I was used to spending all my free time with those boys, so when we went through the breaking up process, it was a major transition. 

Going from seeing your boyfriend every single day, to nothing at all is a big change.

But, with Taylor, I was already used to not seeing him.

 

I really thought that when I took down all the pictures and pulled out all the old birthday/anniversary cards that I would get really upset.

But, surprisingly, I didn't.

I was more happy about getting all that clutter out of my room.

 

Simplifying can be very peaceful.

Not only did I pack up all that old relationship junk, I threw out a lot of other things I was holding onto in hopes of using again someday.

There's no use for holding onto the past.

If you are not using it now, right now, get rid of it.

There is no sense in holding onto something that is doing absolutely nothing for you.

It will only take up space. {And I mean this in more than one context.}

 

I am loving this new me.

Until next time...