Sacrifices

Sacrifices.

 We all have to make them at some point in our lives.

 But how do we know what to sacrifice and let go? 

We have to decide what is going to benefit ourselves in the long run and then continue on that path.

Still, the decision sometimes is a hard one to make.

If pharmacy school has taught me one thing so far, it is that I am constantly having to make sacrifices.

I never realized how much time I would spend in class, nor how much time I would spend out of class working on stuff for class! 

The way my school is set up is that I attend class from 9AM to 12PM. 

Three hours I sit in one classroom for ONE class.

From 12PM to 1PM is lunch time.

You would think one hour is a lot of time for lunch.

No, not at all.

Especially when you live 30 minutes from the school.

Basically my lunch hour consists of me eating a turkey and ham sandwich (everyday) with a cup of jello and a few baked lays. 

While eating, I normally work on assignments for class! 

Occasionally I get to search facebook or pinterest for a few minutes if I complete my assignments or just to give my brain a break.

From 1PM to 4PM is class time again.

Another three hours that I sit in the same classroom as before for ONE class. 

By the time 4PM rolls around, my brain is fried and I just want to go home and nap.

Oh, but no.

Normally, at 4PM it's time to meet up with your group and work on "group assignments" for another 30 minutes to an hour, depending on the type of assignment.

Finally around 5PM, I get to head home.

The 30 minute drive home gives my brain a break, however, I am normally thinking about all the stuff I have to do for school that evening to prepare for the next day. 

When I first started pharmacy school, I didn't add the gym into my schedule because I wanted to get used to routine of going to class and coming home to study.

For the last two weeks, I have added the gym back into my schedule because, let's face it, if I don't go to the gym regularly, I am going to gain weight!

Especially when I'm sitting on my butt all day everyday in class!

So from 5-5:30PM to 6-6:30PM I am at the gym lifting weights and doing a 30 minute cardio workout.

After my workout, I head home and cook dinner.

Prepping dinner, cooking dinner, and eating dinner normally takes about an hour.

Finally, by 7:30PM I am finished with my day.

Or so you would think...

No, now it is time to go upstairs and begin studying for a pop quiz that could happen the next day or for an exam that is over a TON of information. 

I usually spend from 7:30PM to 10:00PM studying or working on homework assignments. 

Then I shower and get ready for bed. 

My goal every night is to be in bed by no later than 11PM. 

Especially when I have to be up at 6:45AM every morning. 

I am the type of person that needs a minimum of 7 hours of sleep to function!

I try to take off Friday evenings to give myself a break.

However, the more I get into the curriculum, I'm finding it harder and harder to take a break.

Sundays are my day for grocery shopping, cleaning the apartment, and washing/folding all the laundry - along with continuing the studying.

Pharmacy school is hard.

But if it was easy, everyone would do it.

Pharmacy school is time consuming.

But I guess that's what I signed up for when I chose a 3 year accelerated pharmacy school program.

I have had to make a lot of sacrifices so far since I started pharmacy school on August 7th.

But, I can tell that my sacrifices and hard work is already paying off. 

So far I have received all A's and B's on my exams.

I'm proud of my performance so far.

My success so far is all due to sacrifices.

These sacrifices are going to pay off in the end.

It's hard to see that now and I may complain a lot along the way, but I know deep down these sacrifices are going to be worth it.

I have my family to thank for supporting me through each hard time and motivating me to continue on this path.

Everyday, someone in my family tells me how proud they are of me and how they can see the hard work I am putting into my studies. 

It might seem small, but that support is what motivates me to keep pushing through each day. 

I am beyond thankful for my support system.

Until next time...

 

 

Why Worry?

I have wanted to write a blog post for sometime now, but never knew exactly what to write about.

I always start writing out a story and then stop and think, nah, no one wants to read that and end up deleting the whole thing.

But today, a thought ran through my head and I thought, that would be a great post to write about.

So here it goes…

Worrying.

Why do we do it to ourselves?

Does worrying about something make you feel better?

No.

Does worrying about something change what’s going to happen?

No.

So what exactly does worrying do?

I found a quote on this topic and thought it was great, so I have to share.

It says, “Why worry about the future when God is already busy preparing it for you?”

My life is already planned out for me.

God has prepared a wonderful life for me and all I have to do is live each day happily and know that no matter what I do, my life is already planned out.

I cannot change the plan for my life.

My actions and choices will reflect who I become as a person, but I cannot change what has already been planned out for me.

So why do we try to plan out the way our life is going to happen?

I am guilty of this… Beyond guilty of this.

I am always planning out my future and how I want my life to happen, but in reality, I am wasting my time.

Now, don’t get me wrong.

I think that having an idea of what you want out of life is important to keep yourself on track.

But, I ultimately have no control on how my life is going to turn out.

God already knows how my life is going to turn out, who I’m going to end up with, what my career will be, how many kids I will have, if any, how long I will live, etc.

I know that he will put the right people in my life to push me into the life he has planned for me.

So why worry about what’s going to happen?

Why worry about when something is going to happen?

I have to remember that I have no control.

Worrying about something will only cause trouble and take away today’s peace.

No more worrying.

I am blessed beyond reason and I will live my life happily everyday.

I will know that every time something bad happens, it is happening for a reason.

I will not question it, but go with the flow and know that it is in God’s plan for me to get me to the life He has planned for me.

Until next time...



Hope

She is the kind of girl who is always smiling and loves to laugh.  

If you are falling down, she will be right there to pick you up.  

She is the one that always says sorry, even if it's not her fault.  

Even if she is feeling like the scum of the earth, she will never let you know.  

This is the girl who is afraid to love, because she has already lost so much. 

Until next time...

Solitaire

 

Today at work, I had quite a bit of time on my hands.

In between classes, I decided to play solitaire to help pass the time.

I had already completed all of my work for my online classes.

I had everything planned and ready to go for the rest of the day and Friday.

I thought, why not relax and have a little bit of fun?

This is embarrassing to admit, but I didn’t win one game of solitaire.

And I probably played a minimum of 50 games (this is not an exaggeration).

I just kept playing and playing, game after game, and never won one.

I know, I know.

I must really suck at the game of solitaire.

After about the 45^th game, I began to realize something.

The game of solitaire is really like the game of life.

Wait, not the actual board game “Life”, but life in general.

I know you’re thinking to yourself, “Dear Lord, Hope has lost it.”

But, just hear me out.

I will explain, just keep on reading.

First off, let me just tell you, I played the REAL game of solitaire.

I didn’t cheat and change the settings to “Draw One”.

No, no, no.

I wanted to win fair and square.

I chose “Draw Three”

Rebel, I know…

I could have cheated, played the easy way.

And I probably would have won the majority of those 50+ games I played.

But, would I really have won?

Because deep down, I would have known that I cheated in order to win.

You, as the reader, would have never have known that I cheated if I didn’t tell you.

You might have thought, “Wow! Hope is amazing at the game of solitaire.”

And I could have gone along with it.

Talked myself up and bragged about how good I was because I won so many times.

But, I would have known that I cheated.

The game of solitaire is a complicated one.

You’re not always dealt the best hand, but you try anyways.

You start off trying to make the most matches before ever opening the draw pile.

If you can make a lot of matches before having to open the draw pile, you think, oh yeah, I’m gonna win this one.

Then you open up the draw pile, and begin flipping through the cards.

You start making matches, you get on a roll, and oops!

Then it happens.

You passed up a card you know you could have used.

But, thankfully, there is an UNDO button that can be pressed.

You click on file, hit that undo button, and you’re back to where you were before.

You place the missed card where it belongs and then you move on.

However, in my case anyways, going back to get the missed card never really helped.

I still would end up losing each time.

But, sometimes, going back to pick up that missed card did help push my game a little further.

After every losing game, I got upset.

I won’t lie, I may have used a couple of choice words after losing over and over again.

But, I never stopped playing.

I kept trying again and again with the hopes that I may win the next time.

Although I never won a game, I still want to keep playing.

I still have the hopes that I will win one day.

So now, I want to apply the game of solitaire to the game of life.

We go through life everyday and we are handed all types of things.

We push forward everyday with what we got in hopes to get where we want to go.

There are times when your life will be going perfectly.

You’ll get so caught up in your perfect life, that you may lose sight of what is important.

These important things can include school, family, friends, boyfriend/girlfriend, etc.

You may try and go back to pick up what you lost while you were so busy with your perfect life.

Sometimes, those people will forgive you and let you back in, but sometimes they won’t.

The point is, you still have to keep pushing forward whether going back benefits you or not.

There will be times when it seems like you can’t win anything.

You might feel like the whole world is sitting on your shoulders and you keep losing at everything you do.

But, you never stop trying.

You still get up everyday, put a smile on your face, go to work/school, and push forward.

Deep in the back of your mind, you know that one day, everything is going to get better.

One day, you will have everything you’ve ever wanted.

One day, you will be truly happy with yourself.

Until next time...

Facebook Creeper

The mood has struck to write!

Maybe it's because I just finished writing a seven page paper for my critical thinking class?

Or maybe it's because of the quotes I've been repinning on Pinterest.

Nonetheless, I have decided to write.

I'm feeling a bit liberated at the moment.  

Hold on, let me google search the word "liberated" real quick to make sure I'm using it correctly.......

Okay, I used it correctly.  

I am most definitely feeling liberated tonight.

Now, I won't lie to ya (not sure who it is that reads these post anyway, but whoever you are, I'm not gonna lie to ya).

I had an old Facebook that was still active, however, I never used it.  (Just logged on to view people's profiles that I wasn't friends with on my real Facebook, aka Taylor Rogers).

Since our break up back in September, I have logged on occasionally to creep his profile and see what he was up to.

Crazy, stalkerish, ex girlfriend is what you're thinking... I know, I know. 

But, I told you I wasn't gonna lie to you in this post, so judge if you want to. (I know you've been there before and done it too!)

But, something changed my thinking tonight.

It was a pin I found on Pinterest that read, "I just woke up one day and decided I didn't want to feel like that anymore, or ever again. So I changed, just like that!"

I never realized how much I was hurting myself by looking back at the past.

It wasn't an everyday type thing, but it was enough to where it was holding me back.

After reading the quote from Pinterest, I decided to deactivate my old Facebook permanently. 

I first deleted Taylor from the Facebook account and then deactivated it.

It feels so freeing to let go of the past and truly let it go.

It's been over three months since our break up, so it was definitely time to let him go.

Past time actually.

But everything happens in God's perfect timing.

So much is changing around me and within me.

I have no clue where my life is headed at the moment or where my life is going in the future.

I've made some recent changes in my path ahead, so we'll see how things turn out.

Until then, I will continue to pray for the good Lord to guide me.

Until next time...

 

 

Life's Little Instructions

2013

A New Year ... A New Beginning 

At my meeting today, a flyer was sitting at our table titled, "2013 - A New Year ... A New Beginning".  

Below is what it read:

  

Treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated 

Watch a sunrise at least once a year

Never refuse homemade brownies

Plant a tree on your birthday

Learn three clean jokes

Return borrowed vehicles with the gas tank full

Compliment three people everyday

Sing in the shower

Keep it simple

Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them

Leave everything a litter better than you found it

Think big thoughts but relish in small pleasures

Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know

Never leave the toilet seat up

Floss your teeth

Ask for a raise when you feel like you've earned it

Be forgiving of yourself and others

Overtip a waitress

Say "thank you" and "please" a lot

Buy whatever kids are selling in their front yards

Wear polished shoes

Avoid negative people

Remember other people's birthdays

Commit yourself to constant improvement

Carry jumper cables in your trunk

Have a firm handshake

Sent lots of Valentine cards - sign them, "someone thinks you're really wonderful"

Stop blaming others and take responsibility for every area of your life

Look people in the eye

Strive for excellence, not perfection

Be the first to say, "hello"

Use the good silver

Return all the things you borrow

Make new friends, but cherish the old ones

Keep secrets

Plant flowers every spring

Have a dog

Always accept an outstretched hand

Wave at school kids on school buses

Be there when people need you

Fill a stranger's expired meters

Don't expect life to be fair

Never underestimate the power of love

Live your life as an exclamation, not an explanation

Don't be afraid to say, "I made a mistake"

Don't be afraid to say, "I don't know"

Compliment even small improvements

Always keep your promises

Marry only for love

Rekindle old friendships

Call your mother

I thought this was too sweet not to post for everyone to read.  

This is a new year and a new beginning for everyone.  

I hope everyone has a wonderful 2013!

Until next time...